Today was day one of week two of Kindy for Cooper. He was not a happy camper and did not want to go to school. In fact, he used every excuse he could think of to stay home, but I told him it wasn't a choice and he had to go. He sobbed all the way there. I was able to distract him for short periods of time, but ultimately, when it came time for me to leave him at school, he lost it. I kept trying to leave, but he held on so tightly and told me how much he was going to miss me and Tucker. He finally agreed to "let me" leave when I said I would stand outside the building all day while his teacher was "learning him." Those were his words. :) There was another little girl in tears as well. Her parent had already left her and she was sobbing in the hall outside the classroom. I felt terrible for her as I did for Cooper, but at the same time, was relieved to know Coop wasn't the only one.
The day was very long and I worried a lot about Coop. In my head I knew he would be fine, but my heart was aching for my little boy with those huge tears falling from his beautiful blue eyes that were pleading with me to stay. I went right home and made him some cupcakes with blue icing (his favorite). I hoped that they would help fade the memory of the day and assuage my guilt. I managed to eat quite a bit of the frosting while waiting for pick-up time. It did help ME a bit. :) When it came time to pick him up at school, I actually felt sick to my stomach (and not from the frosting!)
When we arrived at school, we waited right outside the Kindy door so I was sure to see him right away and so he was sure to see me. I was so relieved to see a little smile on his face. It was obvious he didn't want to smile for me, but he couldn't help it completely. He told me he had a good day. I left it at that and let the story of the day unfold over the next few hours.
I did get a chance to talk to his teacher. He said that this behavior is not unusual for kindy kids. He told me that Coop is sad for about 20 minutes or so and when he sees that no one is reacting to his crying, he just stops and settles into the routine. He said he is out there are lunch/recess playing and having a good time. He said he felt bad for ME leaving Coop in such a way and knowing how I felt. That was very comforting.
Coop continues to tell me he doesn't like his school and wants to stay home. In fact, that was the last thing he said to me before bed. I know, deep down, he does like it, but is not ready to admit it to us yet. And, more importantly, I know he likes his teacher because no matter what negative things he says about school he has not said one negative thing about Mr. Strath. That is good.
We went to the park on the way home from school. Coop talked non-stop the whole time. I could tell he was happy by his chatter.
Tomorrow is another day and hopefully that little smile will be a bit bigger at pick up time.
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